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Lord of the Jovi Realm · 07-09-2008, 02:11 AM

Bon Jovi
July 7th, 2008
Palace at Auburn Hills, Detroit, Michigan, USA

***If you only want to read the concert review scroll down to “CONCERT REVIEW”, otherwise feel free to enjoy, or despise my completely verbose ramblings.

***There are some pics at the bottom of the entire review.

Well, kids, it’s been almost 2 years since Julie and I saw Bon Jovi live. And even longer (almost 5 years) since I was inspired to write any kind of review for a show. I am resisting the urge to read other people’s reviews of the show till after I finish mine.

To start at the beginning, we had seen Bon Jovi live about 50 times from 2000-2004 and pretty much loved every minute of it. Sure there were some shit shows (Cincinnati ’03), but not many and they were certainly balanced out by the fantastic shows (Grand Rapids ’01, Chicago ’03). The release of “This Left” frankly left us uninterested after the initial novelty wore off and when “HAND” arrived, despite a few great tunes it didn’t seem to have the same luster and fun of earlier albums or even of the early release of HAND that we had been listening to for a while. We did see a concert for each of these CDs and both were mixed experiences for us. I enjoyed the Borgata Left show and found some respect for an album I basically hated, while Julie loved only the acoustic catalog tunes and the new tracks and covers that weren’t “Left” Julie loved the HAND show and fell in love with Nickelback as an opener, subsequently buying all their CDs and collecting a few live shows as well. I loved the first half but unfortunately our son suffered from heat exhaustion and I spent the second half of the show with him in first aid cooling off.
While the box set was fun, it certainly wasn’t going to inspire a tour and most of those songs were left off of albums because while fun to listen to once or twice, they overall are not top 10 singles of typical Jovi caliber. The release of Lost Highway with it’s much proclaimed “Nashville influence” was not a cause for celebration at our house. While I had heard some snippets much prior to release (in fact I am pretty sure there are other complete tunes from these sessions in the Jovi vault), the novelty quickly wore off and despite the fact that we wanted a new Bon Jovi album to love, this just wasn’t it.
When tour time rolled around we decided not to go see them for this tour. I had just started a new company which was very time consuming, my father was very ill and hearing the reviews and recordings of the “special” Newark run of shows convinced us that Bon Jovi had lost the “magic” both in songwriting and performance. Better for us to remember them as they were than as sad money grubbing caricatures.
Well of course things change J
The US tour featured really very little that seemed special from reading reviews on the Bon Jovi boards, but despite being resigned to having only memories of “Bon Jovi – The Great” we kept reading reviews and message boards hoping for some glint of the former glory. The European tour reviews were awesome, lots of rare songs and stunning performances and miraculously Jon had a voice again. When the last few US shows were announced we decided on Detroit because geographically it is close enough to drive there and back on the day of show. Our hopes were high and we got tickets quickly.
I had never used Stubhub before but it was a decent experience, they are very good at communication, though the fees are a bit steep, but if you are going to use a scalper, I guess use a good one.

There wasn’t much of a wait for our show but we read the reviews of the previous nights show in Canada with baited breath. OHHH, grimace, shudder, wince…
We have seen Jon have a bad night before, sometimes something that isn’t that noticeable to the audience can instantly change a great show to a palpable, grueling chore.
There were all kinds of excuses and speculation as to the cause of the abbreviated lack-luster show. The six most likely candidates are provided here:
1.) Giant hordes of man-eating insects (Jon probably avoids DET due to his allergies, and the venue certainly was aware of the infestation on their own grounds and should have taken care of the situation before it became a problem for paying customers, it’s not in Bon Jovi’s contract to bring along an exterminator and it is contractually the venues responsibility to provide a safe and healthy workplace for performers.)
2.) A last minute key change Jon decided on to help preserve his voice for an upcoming DVD filming, but forgot to confirm with his band.
3.) Aggravation at Richie’s sinus infection for jeopardizing the same DVD filming
4.) Bad sushi
5.) Realization that now that Bobby wears lifts in his shoes, Jon is once again the shortest person on stage (Tico gets extra height as a synergy bonus for his advanced skill in overall coolness)
6.) Internalized rage at Nikki Sixx for not only owning the masters to their own music but also for outing Jon as a patron of prostitutes and a cock blocker on page 127 of his engrossing though pricey (about 30 bucks I think) book “The Heroin Diaries”.

General consensus amongst fans who saw the show was that it was short, and plain vanilla. Consensus amongst internet pundits of Jovi tripe was that they were saving themselves for Central Park.

7/7/08 – pre show
Julie and I opted to rent a car for this show as our trucks are gas/diesel hogs.
We stop around noon at Enterprise and rent a Nissan Sentra which is pretty comfortable and gets great mileage (at 4 hours each way gas mileage was important), on the way home from Enterprise the car’s idiot light for brake problems comes on, then off, then on again. Well back to Enterprise where they switch us out to a Chevy Cobalt which is actually an anagram for the original moniker which was too long for the chrome trunk badge – Crush Or Bruise All Ligaments and Tendons. I kid you not, my F350 7.3L Turbo Diesel rides like the massage of a thousand nubile concubines compared to the brutality of that 4 wheeled little pugilist. And of course I didn’t realize how badly it was beating my body till I entered the exquisite construction and detour zones of Detroit. I was bounced worse than a half dressed Hilton sister from a royal wedding reception.
But I digress…
As I get older I am more anal retentive about planning for things like this little trip. I am surprised that Julie puts up with me J