Aloha !

I know, you've all been waiting for my verdict. I'm sorry, I've been busy, an all mattering review on the record hasn't even been posted, but I'll make it up to you by giving you my all mattering opinion on this show.

Right, so, Richie eh? First show of the tour and all of that. Was it any good? Not really. Oh, you'll say, but it's your opinion Seb, you never like anything, but that's where you're wrong. I really liked the appetizers at Wagamama. I liked the main course which came a staggering 30 minutes too late because they'd forgotten about it and then gave me something I hadn't ordered at all. I liked the crowd, I like the banter with Thierry, Simon and a few others outside of the venue, I just didn't like Richie's show, because frankly, the man did not deliver at all.

Opener Burn That Candle Down was quite messy. It's a mess on the record, but while he played it live he missed out on several words or just forgot to play the lick, unable to remember what part goes where. Sure, we got plenty of duck faces (Jon and Richie should get those trademarked) and Richie looking tough because, you know, this is a hard rock song, but it really isn't. It's just a bunch of loud drums with a bunch of noises on top of it, but apart from Richie the entire band was just kind of like "yeah whatever, do your thing". The only one who seemed to have fun as well was Matt Rollins who was slamming the keys on his keyboard getting in the groove, but apart from that it was quite a shitty opener.

After this dreadful experience I kind of expected a Bon Jovi song to follow up, but instead we got his latest hit. Well...hit...the song kind of went over like a lead balloon, the song just doesn't work as a live track, on the record all sorts of effects are used to make the instruments blend into each other but live everything is quite muddy, something that showed itself during the few TV performances. What saved the song was the crowd. The Melkweg is quite a good concert venue itself, nice and small and for whatever reason the atmosphere is often brilliant there, as was the case with last night. But face it, Richie plays in front of Bon Jovi fans who come to see him play and have his records, so will enjoy it. Would he play this on a festival like other indie acts do (Because you know, he's gone indie now) no one would really care for songs like these. He struggled himself through this one like he's always done, and it was apparent that he was hoarse already. I read that he's got a cold, and maybe he does, but he's sounded like this for a good 10 years now so I reckon it's just some excuse they use for the sound of his voice.

Taking A Chance On The Wind didn't work that well either. Not many sang along, but finally, near the end of the song when he actually did start to jam the energy went up a bit. He also seemed to be a bit more confident when being out on the loose as opposed to being stuck to verses and choruses. After about 10 minutes I finally thought I'd get to see a side of Richie I liked at Bon Jovi shows, but he was very sloppy (not that I've never seen that at Bon Jovi show), but that's not the side I prefer. His licks were all over the place and he seemed to miss notes on a regular basis now.

After a "how you doing so far ok" moment (not in those words, they're copyrighted and Richie can't use them unless he sucks Jons dick a bit more) we got to hear Stranger. Richie changed his tone, and although Thierry was on the balcony and I was on the floor, from the moment he played his first lick I looked up and saw him looking back at me (that magic is still there <3) and we both thought the same; his tone was dire. What was fun though was how the crowd sang along to the chorus, Richie noticing this and then letting the crowd sing. The issue with the tone of his guitar showed itself even more during the solo, when the effects on his guitar pedal made it impossible for him to play the solo like he remembered. After his voice slipped during the higher notes in the outro and we got the outro jam it was as if he struggled to get through it, barely remembering how it went and needing to focus on his outro solo as opposed to it coming just naturally. His tone really ruined it and by now the sound of the band started to annoy me a bit as well. Very rough, but not in a rock kind of way, but in a sloppy kind of way. The bass drum was way too loud and the second guitarist barely audible.

Nowadays followed, which was the first real surprise of the night. It's a nice song, but a friend of mine rightly said so that it's a teeny bopper. It's like the Jonas Brothers on steroids, and the song got old quite fast. What also became obvious was how Richie was relying on effects when singing live as well. He put some sing-along section in it which only half of the venue really picked up on, but considering how Richie's as blind as a bat I doubt he could even see how no one in the back gave a shit about this one. Well, my brother did was singing his longs out (right in my ear thank you very much) but apart from that the pace of the show slowly started to go down. After the song another "how you doing so far" moment came up, and, I've noticed this before, Richie seems to be in a desperate need of approval. "You like this one? You like that one?" He went into some story on how he needs feedback, but he kind of gives himself feedback by saying "You like Every Road...You like Burn That Candle Down...", kind of feeding us the lines he really wants to hear us say. This would happen every few songs. Instead of asking "you doing ok" we'd get a "YOU ARE DOING OK HA YOU LIKE THAT HA" kind of thing. Not that humble, but when looking behind it what really showed itself was how insecure he really was while playing in a venue packed with 1.500 fans that came out to see him.

Up next was Weathering The Storm, another shit song. Not many seemed to care for this one, and neither did I. It really comes across as a "oh poor me I've had such a shitty life..." kind song. Please pity me please. I won't get into THAT line, but needless the say it's a poor song. Richie had to brag about writing with Bernie Taupin though I doubt anyone, few exceptions there, knows who Bernie Taupin is. And face it, Taupin has written a lot of shit with Elton John as well, it's not as everything that duo has written has been gold, and neither is Weathering The Storm The double neck came out for Wanted, and while playing the song it also became apparent how Richie had prepared all his improvisations, and when a crowd actually went ahead and did them before he'd started them he'd just start over. So we ended up singing the first verse to Wanted twice. First when the crowd started it, and then with Richie starting it. When Richie stood there listening to us sing he looked a bit confused as to where to go next, so with all his creativity he'd just start over. Wanted was quite a rushed performance, and during the switch of acoustic to electric they once again managed to **** it up so we wound up hearing only half of the guitar solo. Nothing new there.

What followed now was one of the oddest performances at a Bon Jovi show I've ever seen. Richie singing Sugar Daddy, and doing improvs, grabbing his crotch several times, encouraging us into singing "I could be your sugar daddy" which not many picked up on. He just doesn't seem to get how a 50+ year old singing about being a sugar daddy is quite pathetic and it made the crowd rather uncomfortable as well. When his daughter is old and mature enough to realize what daddy sang about I’m sure she’ll be proud. Richie seemed to have a blast, but it really was quite awkward, him going into how he'd shagged ladies and had been a sugar daddy. Really, that's not something you're supposed to make fun of, it's pathetic really but it all seems to go over his head.

And although I thought it couldn't get any worse, it went even more downhill from there. Richie doing an Oasis cover. I'm sure many of you know I'm a big Oasis fan, but when he started singing this I just couldn't stop laughing. He tried mimicking Liam's voice by singing it in the same way Liam would, though the song is sung by Noel, the other brother, for those unfamiliar with the band. He stood there looking at his i-Pad (modern day teleprompter) but couldn't keep with the words at all. He'd clearly looked at YouTube vids of the song played by Oasis as well, encouraging us to sing along. But, you know, that works at Oasis gigs, or at shows by bands from the same genre, but not at shows from a washed up guitarist playing in a pop rock band. He stood there stuttering the words, playing dodgy guitar licks trying to sound like Liam and needless to say, his cover was a joke. He seemed to realize it too, because once it was done (missing out on the final words of the song, probably not listed on his i-pad) we got another WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THAT THAT WAS AWESOME HA? I KNOW YOU'RE TWEETING OUT THERE SAYING I LOVED THAT OASIS COVER I THOUGHT IT WAS ****ING COOL though I doubt anyone would have put those words on Twitter.