dont know where to put this...*shrugs*

After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a
gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with
the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The
mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on
the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot
reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said
that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some
actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas
pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way,
Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

P = The problem logged by the pilot,

S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute desent
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like
a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

HIHHIH!!!!!

Thanks for the laugh This was incredibly funny!!!!!

Very amusing Also liking your signature - Luke's shoes do get around don't they

haha, fantastic!

That last one was very funny. There were a few other funny ones in there too, but that last one was the best.

Adrian

One of my friend is mechanic at Roissy Charles de gaulle airport, one day he sent me this, and he said, you have no idea in fact how much it's true !

Scary

That was funny. Thanks for the good laugh.