Next time you go for a curry take this with you and sing aloud (if you have been fuelled with enough beer!)

To only be sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen

Naan,just killed a man
Poppadom against his head
Had lime pickle now he's dead

Naan, dinners just begun
but now i'm gonna crap it all away
naan, ooh ooh
didn't mean to make you cry
seen nothing yet just the loo tomorrow
curry on, curry on
Cause nothing really Madras.
Too late my dinners gone
sends shiver down my spine
Rectum aching all the time
Goodbye onion Bhaji, i've got to go
gotta leave you all behind and use the loo
naan, ooh, ooh
This dopiaza is so mild
I sometimes wish we'd never come here at all

Solo

I see a little chicken tikka on the side
Rogan Josh, Rogan Josh pass the chutney made of mango
Vindaloo does nicely
Very, Very, Spicey
Meat!
Byriani (Byriani)
Byriani (Byriani)
Byriani and a Naan (a Vindaloo loo loo loo)
I've eaten balti, somebody help me
He's eaten balti, get him to the lavatory
Stand you well back
'case the loo is quarantined...........
Here it comes
There it goes
Technicolor yawn
I chunder
NO !
It's coming up again (there he goes)
I chunder, it's coming back again (there he goes)
Coming back again (up again)
Here it come again
(No no no no no no NO)
on my knees, I'm on my knees
On his knees, oh there he goes
This Vindaloo
Is about to wreck my guts
poor me .. poor me.. poor meee!

Solo

So you think you can chunder and then feel alright !
So you try to eat curry and drink beer all night !
Oh maybe, but now you'll puke like a baby
Just had to come out
It just to come right out in here

Solo (slow bit)

Korma, sag or bhuna
Bhaji, balti or naan
nothing makes a difference
nothing makes a difference
to meeeee
Anyway, your wind blows ....sssshhhhhhhhh