It's FRIDAY!

Drugs - indeed.

Why? Cause we're fukced up and can't pick the right ones! Though if we picked the right ones, we'd be bored out of our minds with them.

And mostly, because they smell so good and their voices make my knees weak and on and on I could go ..... *sigh* But I don't know why they can't stay irresistable, why they need to lose their luster and the good smell turns into nauseating stench while they rip out my heart and trample my feelings while sucking my emotions dry like a leech.....

They can't stay irresistable when their actions result in negative association.

For some reason...watching Blanche, Rose, Sophia and Dorothy is comforting... probably because they had the right idea about how to live a happy and fulfilling life.

I would have to disagree with this. I've never been bored out my mind with my husband - but then he never (once) ever tried to stop me from doing something I wanted to.

The thing about that sort of freedom is that it goes both ways. I don't stop him from doing things either. Perhaps neither of us is terribly needy but it has worked out well for us.

That gives some hope to the rest of us. I know for me though, whatever it is I wind up attracting abusive types who take advantage rather than responsibility..... and I'm guilty of not setting boundaries and allowing it. A good long number of years of being happy and achieving things in life is probably what's called for in my case, but then the whole "I'm going to die alone...wahhh!!!!" thing kicks in.

Who? ???


Well, I obviously wasn't talking about you, Kathleen. I was talking about those of us that are emotionally fukced up. I realize that there are "good guys" out there, I know that because that is what people like you keep yaking about (and some of my friends) and I know that because some of them even post here.

However, not all of us are that lucky to be as emotionally healthy as you and are not able to enter into or stay in relationships with these equally healthy men. That's my life and it's real. I am not attracted to guys that offer healthy relationships and most likely they are not attracted to me. That is not for lack of trying, I assure you. It is that I am also not able to recognize the good guys, I suppose. It's easy for me now (after too many years of experience) to recognize the obvious bad guys, but there are lots of them that are not "obvious" bad guys but that turn out to be controlling and abusive at a time when it is too late to jump off.

I know you didn't mean any more with your comment than to point out that not all relationships have to be that way, but it still makes me sick to hear it because it's not possible for me or anyone else with similar emotional ill-health. I feel your comment trivialized Dave's and my experiences and struggles and that is not necessary.



Dave!!! Please!

Being in an isolating relationship can feel much more lonely than NOT being in that relationship. Whether or not you die alone has nothing to do with a mate. Being in a committed relationship does not guarantee you that that person will outlive you, nor does not being in a relationship mean you have not friends at the time you die.

Besides, I believe that you an only find true and healthy love once you yourself are true and healthy. Nothing wrong with taking a few years to get to that place and maybe stuff will happen when you least excpect it.

(ok that's drippy bullshit but it might make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside for a few minutes )

Spunky, it didn't! That's just what a healthy relationship looks like.

LMAO!!!!!

BleedingPurist!!!!!!!!! I'm getting worried here....

Argghhh! Don't tell me how that comment made ME feel!!!! Again, I realize she didn't mean to trivialize, but *I* FELT it did.

I'm not telling you how to feel.

I'm just starting to get a real grip on how, and it in what way, my own relationship was dysfunctional... What Kathleen described is pretty much my picture of things being better and healthier.

Just more TRUST.