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  #1  
Old 10-24-2003, 04:38 AM
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ugly_queen_from_mars ugly_queen_from_mars is offline
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Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever," -- Miss Alabama in the
1994 Miss USA contest.
``````````````````````````````````
"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." --Mariah Carey
``````````` `````````````````````````````````````````````````` `````
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life," --Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti smoking campaign.
`````````````````````````````````````````````````
"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body," --
> >Winston Benne! tt, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
> > `````````````````````````````````````````````
> > "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates
> >in the country," -- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.
> > `````````````````````````````
> > "I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We
are
> >the president." -- Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of
subpoenaed
> >documents.
> > `````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``
> > "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass,
and
> >I'm just the one to do it," -- A congressional candidate in Texas.
> > ````````````````````````````
> > "I don't feel we did wrong in taking this great country away fr! om
> >them. There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the
> >Indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves." -- John Wayne
> > `````````````````````````````````````````````````` ````````````````
> > "Half this game is ninety percent mental." -- Philadelphia Phillies
> >manager, Danny Ozark
> > ``````````````````````````````````
> > "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the
impurities
> >in our air and water that are doin! g it." -- Al Gore, Vice President
> > ```````````````````
> > "I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix." -- Dan Quayle
> > ````````````````` ``````` ``````` ``````` ``````` ``````` ```````
> >``````` ```` ``` ``````` ``````` ``````` ``````` ``
> > " It's no exaggeration to say that the undecideds could go one way or
> >another" -- George Bush, US President
> > ``````````````````````
> > "We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"
> >-- Lee Iacocca
> > `````````````````````````````````````````````````` `````!
> >`````````````````````````````````````````
> > "I was provided with additional input that was radically different
from
> >the truth. I assisted in furthering that version." -- Colonel Oliver
North,
> >from his Iran-Contra testimony.
> > `````````````````````````````````````````
> > "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy
like
> > Norman Einstein." -- Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports
> >analyst.
> > ````````````````````````````````````````````
> > "We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of
> >people." --Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.
> > `````````````````````````````````
> > "If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." -- Bill Clinton,
> >President
> > ````````````````` `
> > "We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur." --
Al
> >Gore, VP
> > ``````````
> > "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas." --
> >Keppel Enderbery
> > ```````````````
> > "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we
> >received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply
if
> >there is a change in your circumstances." -- Department of Social
Services,
> >Greenville, South Carolina
> > ````````````````````````````````````````````
> > "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as
> >they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And
> >the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record." -- Mark
S.
> >Fowler, FCC Chairman

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  #2  
Old 10-24-2003, 04:40 AM
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I like the one about Washington DC! LOL Thanks for this!

Stephanie
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  #3  
Old 10-24-2003, 05:04 AM
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Here's a goodie

"The doctors say it's chronic because it keeps coming back"

Anna Kournikova on her back pain

Stephanie
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I vow to never drink alone,
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  #4  
Old 10-24-2003, 08:04 AM
*-- Vallie --*'s Avatar
*-- Vallie --* *-- Vallie --* is offline
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Goooood morning all
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  #5  
Old 10-24-2003, 10:18 AM
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There funny
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  #6  
Old 10-24-2003, 06:55 PM
Neurotica80 Neurotica80 is offline
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Default Re: lol

Quote:
Originally Posted by ugly_queen_from_mars
"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." --Mariah Carey [/color]
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  #7  
Old 10-24-2003, 07:04 PM
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Guitar Girl Guitar Girl is offline
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Default Re: lol

Quote:
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life," --Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti smoking campaign.


Quote:
"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." --Mariah Carey
Because of that my mother hates Mariah Carey.
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Old 10-24-2003, 07:06 PM
Neurotica80 Neurotica80 is offline
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Default Re: lol

[quote="Guitar Girl"]
Quote:

Quote:
"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." --Mariah Carey
Because of that my mother hates Mariah Carey.
The thing is shes so stupid she wont even understand what shes said wrong
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  #9  
Old 10-24-2003, 07:08 PM
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Thanks for this good laugh ! and yes, the Mariah's one is terrible !
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  #10  
Old 10-24-2003, 10:36 PM
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Tashjbj Tashjbj is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jess
Thanks for this good laugh ! and yes, the Mariah's one is terrible !
As terrible as Mariah herself!

Very funny!!

Tash
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