before i got my own pad, december 1998, went out got very drunk, came home and was woken up by the sound of my dad shouting "kev, get down before your mother sees you" woke up in bed, all noce and warm, only to find out that i was not in bed but on the roof of the garden shed with nothin but my boxer shorts on!!! when i went upstairs found 24 bags of twiglets in a perfect line on my bed, which means, i had come in, went to my room, arranged the twiglets then decided that it would be a good idea to sleep on the shed, plus i hate twiglets.

Last summer after a crazy weekend in London, thanks to many jovitalkers, came home, went to strip club with best mates girlfriend (nothing funny going on) and got drunk, ended up in asda at god knows what time, only clue was next morning when i walked into front room to find 7 asda carrier bags, when i opened fridge to get a drink, 3 tubs of coleslaw landed on my feet. Fridge was full of stuff i hate, ie, crabsticks etc. can't even remember shopping there!!!!