wow. with all the criticism of jbj, i'm surprised he's not in the top ten!


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Sting the worst lyricist ever
Neil Hickey
October 16, 2007 02:00pm



STING might be wowing them in the reincarnation of 80s band The Police but the British rocker has been slammed for having the worst lyrics of all time.

Sting has beaten a host of other influential songwriters - including Jim Morrison, Paul McCartney, Jon Bon Jovi, Alanis Morissette and Robert Plant - for the ignominious title.

American music magazine Blender disembowelled Sting - infamous for the song De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da and for rhyming "cough" with Russian author Vladimir Nabakov - for his "mountainous pomposity, cloying spirituality and ham-handed metaphors".

"Once publications labelled him the 'Thinking Woman's Sex Symbol', a low-watt lightbulb popped on in his head, illuminating the way toward a self-serious future. Sting would go on to rip off Chaucer's 'Canterbury Tales,' St. Augustine's 'Confessions' ... even Shakespeare," the magazine wrote of the 56-year-old singer.

"After the Police split, Sting pursued a second career, liberating soccer mums from their 'soul cages.' Jazz musicians were involved. A lute was purchased. Volvo bumper stickers were quoted ('If you love someone, set them free')."

Rounding out the top five were Neil Peart from the band Rush, Scott Stapp from grunge band Creed, Noel Gallagher and folk singer Dan Fogelberg.

Of Fogelberg, the magazine said: "No-one can bum out a dentist's waiting room like this titan of 70s light rock. His sappiest moment might be his 1981 ode to the Kentucky Derby, Run For The Horses, in which he serenades a champion thoroughbred in weirdly erotic terms."

The magazine described Gallagher, member of UK group Oasis, as a buffoon and said he "probably could have used some Ritalin to go with the lager and cocaine".

Kiss band member Paul Stanley - whose lyrics include "Baby, let's put the 'x' in sex, love's like a muscle and you make me wanna flex" and "she's a dancer, a romancer, I'm a Capricorn and she's a Cancer" - was ranked seventh and was probably lucky not to have gone higher.

The top ten is:

1 - Sting

2 - Neil Peart

3 - Scott Stapp

4 - Noel Gallagher

5 - Dan Fogelberg

6 - Tom Marshall

7 - Paul Stanley

8 - Diane Warren

9 - Donovan

10 - Jim Morrison



link to article: http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/s...7-7642,00.html