This is fantastic.

I just called my surgery's answerphone to see what time they would be open tomorrow. After explaining at length the fact that the surgery was closed and that this was a recorded message he gives the opening hours and the adress, being sure to point out I shouldn't contact them again before that time. Taking a lengthy pause he then begins to list the numbers and adresses for out of hours pharmacies. Then, he explains, we should call NHS direct for general health advice or to be sure to visit www.nhsdirect.com.

Then and only then does the next sentence begin "if the situation is life-threatening or extremely urgent....."