I'm the "other" person.

I've heard that Britney's music is used in satanic masses and rituals. Her image, when held upside down, reveals the true identity of the Anti-Christ. The screaming of freshly slashed kittens and other cute forest creatures is recorded during the black mass and when played backwards, it spawns a new Britney record. That's why her fans take joy in decapitating squirrels, hamsters, puppies, birds and all that is not ugly. She must be stopped before we're left with nothing but beavers. Big, ugly beavers. And global warming.

I like your post above. I'm gonna make you a cake and I will mail it to you.