Quote:
Originally Posted by Mysterytrain
(Post 1125589)
I've been puzzling over all of the theories I've seen/discussed/read regarding the Richie situation, and I've come up with an idea to add to the mix. As a big Richie fan, I'd love to be proven wrong about this, but since I have anxiety and emotional codependency issues, myself, I can empathize some, if this scenario has any truth to it.
Basically, I'm wondering if Richie has replaced drinking to cope with stress with fleeing conflict (literally).
The story that made me consider this angle was one I had forgotten: Last year, Richie and Denise Richards were scheduled to present at an awards show. Apparently, they got into an argument, and Richie took off and flew back to L.A., leaving Denise to present the award on her own.
Meanwhile, Richie does his solo tour in Europe, which sold out in pre-sale! He is loved, he is adored. He Tweets enthusiastically after each show. However, the U.S. dates don't fare so well, so he claims illness and cancels most of them, and turns the LA show into a charity show (commendable, of course, but by doing this, he can also take the focus off of himself and what might otherwise be disappointment at not selling to a packed house). Therefore, stress of poor sales averted, even if for only one show.
On Twitter, fans get pissed that he's cancelled so many U.S. shows, and they call him out on it. Eventually, perhaps after being 'attacked' one too many times, Richie sends out a couple of nearly incoherent Tweets. Though I didn't understand quite what he was saying, the tone I got was akin to a cornered, wounded animal, trying to defend itself. However, by the next day, Richie claimed his Twitter account had been hacked, and that we should just ignore the seemingly out-of-character Tweets.
Now, magnify that type of scene, only have Jon as the source of the conflict. Richie gets offended by something, and flees by leaving the tour. Instead of dealing with the conflict, he can hide out for a few weeks, then send a few Tweets to his own Twitter fan base, and then chill and watch his 'Every Road' contest submissions, while, in the very same state of California, his band mates play a show (and just in case they're wondering how he's doing as they prepare to go live, he Tweets he's 'having fun'). No crisis here!
If any of this is true, then it says to me that Richie's coping mechanism is the main problem here: Perhaps he has substituted drinking with running away from stress. Unfortunately, this behavior affects a lot more than the band; it affects his loyal fans, as well. On his part, it points to deeper psychological issues than addiction.
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Very well said and in my opinion, spot on.
I just would like to put my two cents worth in...
Your last statement is a light bulb moment, for me, regardless if Richie returns to this tour or not.
I have one or two people in my/our family that cope with stress by doing this very same thing, and one or two that do add alcohol to the mix. Never put 2 and 2 together, especially with one of them, until now. Especially, the stress = flee/flight for many people, whether physically or by using other means, such as alcohol. (excessively)
Richie needs to find a healthy way to deal with this issue, like so many other people do. A positive method vs a negative method, if you will. For example, a lot of people use running and other sports, (other healthier ways), to deal with stress.
Thank you for writing what you wrote, above, for a multitude of reasons.
Richie could use some *true friends* who would help him sort out his demons. All he gets from fans is unconditional adoration. What he needs, is someone that he trusts, that would "get real" with him, treat him like a normal person, so to speak.
In order for that to happen, Richie, has to reach a point where he is open to receiving that input and not taking it as criticism. That is the key, imo.
I always thought a month or so...in rehab was not enough for Richie or for anyone to sort out their issues that led them to drink excessively, anyway.
If Richie is going to succeed at, *anything*, in the future, whether on his own, or with the band, he has to get these psychological issues sorted out, first.
Otherwise, down the road, I feel he is in for a very challenging path, in finding that every road does not lead home to "you" but rather, to ~ "himself", someone he has real issues with, apparently. And, is not yet, willing to face them, instead he is still in the pointing fingers mode.
Even if he goes back on tour, I fear it will just make things worse for him. Anyone that's been touring as long as he has, can put on a great act on stage, but what happens when the show(s) are over (for him)?
It seems that the only person, in his life, at the moment, who is helping to keep R grounded, is Ava. He obviously adores her and does not want to let her down. But, as she grows up, and moves away, more and more, on her own, then what?
I guess, if he found the right woman, he could still have another family, that might help stabilize him? The problem with that, is him finding the "right woman". Someone that could make him face his own demons and support him, give him something to believe in, something to live for, etc.
To fight an addiction, to be comfortable with one's own self, a person needs all the support that they can get. A Rockstar also needs someone to keep them grounded.
Richie does not seem to have that. The other members in the band, do seem to have that. imo, therein lies one of the major differences, between the rest of the band and Richie.
He is not the only person, in history, that has had tremendous talent, but chooses a path of self destruction, as they get older and older, for whatever reason.
It's sad to watch, I love Richie, but that is not what he needs to hear. Unfortunately, at this time, he is not willing to hear anything else.
Again, thank you to ~ Mysterytrain. You have (obviously) given me a lot to think about, both in regards to Richie and in regards to my/our own family.
