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-   -   No Richie on current leg of the tour (https://drycounty.com/jovitalk/showthread.php?t=55338)

jovigirloz 06-19-2013 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jessycardy (Post 1140670)
I was just messing around with all the A-list, B-list celebrity stuff... No worries. ;)

Uhm. I was actually joking. I don't think Jon nailed those women or... whoever. I made that up, you know.

Oh Ok.. when I first saw W celebrity it made me think of a wrestler... don't know why.. ;)

jovigirloz 06-19-2013 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Becky (Post 1140672)
Heather said on a Jay Leno interview that she "hoped" Richie had groupies so I don't think she would have cared too much if he did cheat on her. She always came across as a complete imbecile in interviews IMO. She was married to Tommy Lee so she's probably used to a man who can't keep his pants zipped.

Maybe she was "dickmatized" if rumours of Richie and Tommy's sizes are correct.

Sissy3 06-19-2013 03:22 PM

My buddies and I always said she had a knack for finding....um...."gifted" men. ;)

jovigirloz 06-19-2013 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BJ?YesPlease (Post 1140673)
Hilarious. And in all likelihood utter schiessen.

However...is it just me...or does this have a bit of a whiff of "ticking all the boxes" to it?

Just a bit ;)

A question for you all....
If Richie was to write a tell all, would you read it? Or would you feel like you were being disloyal?

I'd read it, but probably feel a little bit guilty.

Matrix15 06-19-2013 03:29 PM

Right. After one hundred and seventy three thousand billion pages of speculation, I've had enough. Here is the TRUTH. Choose to believe it or not but don't bang on about any alternate theories you've pulled out from under the sofa once you've read this.
Secondly, I strongly urge a mod to lock this thread after this post as there is simply nothing else to be said. Mystery solved. Finito. End of.

Here we go then, firstly I direct your attention back to a much older thread about the bizarre relationships in the Jovi camp:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matrix15 (Post 968084)
It's blatantly obvious what happened:

During HAND Jon and Jen got close, two cheerful musicians, it was bound to happen.

The chemistry developed:

http://www.cmt.com/sitewide/assets/i...40/189x182.jpg

This led Bon Jovi to 'experiment' with a country record, despite the fact it was Jennifer Nettles secret influence behind it.

The suprising success of LH led Jon to go for a younger model:
http://www.cmt.com/sitewide/assets/i...re-150x150.jpg

Uncle Richie, annoyed at not porking anyone in a while, makes Jon hire Lorenza Ponce then tries it on with her live:

http://link.photo.pchome.com.tw/s08/...8/124644401119

VIDEO PROOF! Watch from 3 mins onwards:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FihojlPMjQ8

Unfortunately for Uncle Richie it appears Lorenzas taken and Jonny ain't gonna get Jen or Leann back so they have to turn to the last resort: Each other.

http://www.bonjovi-friendship.com/bl...ie-sambora.jpg

PS - Don't ask why I keep referring to him as Uncle Richie, I'm drunk as I type this.

Jon and Richies passionate affair continued through Lost Highway and into The Circle. (The album cover where they walk forward into a dark hole is a clever reference to Richie's bumhole). However, the album bombing strained their relationship and Richie needed to somewhere to stretch his 'creative muscle'.

It became blatantly clear that Uncle Richie and Nikki 'Sticky' Lund have been fumbling under the sheets for ages. Hell, the song white trash beautiful was about Lund herself, not the god awful clothing line.

http://www3.pictures.zimbio.com/bg/W...w42O2KsOZl.jpg

The lead singer of our beloved band found out and became Jon Bon Jealous, he gave Richie an ultimatum... Nikki or the Band.

http://csdaley.files.wordpress.com/2...vi-300x300.jpg

and guess who Richie chose in the end..........

CKatz 06-19-2013 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jovigirloz (Post 1140677)
Just a bit ;)

A question for you all....
If Richie was to write a tell all, would you read it? Or would you feel like you were being disloyal?

I'd read it, but probably feel a little bit guilty.

I'd absolutely want to read it. It would be really entertaining.
I don't know why you'd feel guilty...we don't know any of them personally. So who cares?
But I doubt he'll ever write a tell-all, mostly because of his daughter.

jessycardy 06-19-2013 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matrix15 (Post 1140678)
Right. After one hundred and seventy three thousand billion pages of speculation, I've had enough. Here is the TRUTH. Choose to believe it or not but don't bang on about any alternate theories you've pulled out from under the sofa once you've read this.
Secondly, I strongly urge a mod to lock this thread after this post as there is simply nothing else to be said. Mystery solved. Finito. End of.

Here we go then, firstly I direct your attention back to a much older thread about the bizarre relationships in the Jovi camp:



Jon and Richies passionate affair continued through Lost Highway and into The Circle. (The album cover where they walk forward into a dark hole is a clever reference to Richie's bumhole). However, the album bombing strained their relationship and Richie needed to somewhere to stretch his 'creative muscle'.

It became blatantly clear that Uncle Richie and Nikki 'Sticky' Lund have been fumbling under the sheets for ages. Hell, the song white trash beautiful was about Lund herself, not the god awful clothing line.

http://www3.pictures.zimbio.com/bg/W...w42O2KsOZl.jpg

The lead singer of our beloved band found out and became Jon Bon Jealous, he gave Richie an ultimatum... Nikki or the Band.

http://csdaley.files.wordpress.com/2...vi-300x300.jpg

and guess who Richie chose in the end..........

THIS IS IT.

That's all, folks. It's been fun. I still believe Richie might change his mind and find the right track back to real love again, though. So... I wouldn't lock the thread just yet!

Sissy3 06-19-2013 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matrix15 (Post 1140678)
Right. After one hundred and seventy three thousand billion pages of speculation, I've had enough. Here is the TRUTH. Choose to believe it or not but don't bang on about any alternate theories you've pulled out from under the sofa once you've read this.
Secondly, I strongly urge a mod to lock this thread after this post as there is simply nothing else to be said. Mystery solved. Finito. End of.


and guess who Richie chose in the end..........

Well there ya go. Guess I can get back to work and leave this thread forever......or not. :D Sounds like Jon was dickmatized.

Javier 06-19-2013 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jovigirloz (Post 1140677)
Just a bit ;)

A question for you all....
If Richie was to write a tell all, would you read it? Or would you feel like you were being disloyal?

I'd read it, but probably feel a little bit guilty.

I can just imagine what it would say. Jon is a benevolent dictator who has to have it his own way every time, he doesn't want dirt to be public knowledge because of the image thing, Dave is a whipped pussy, Tico, well he's cool and doesn't give a shit about anything, just give him a cigar some iced tea and let him read the newspaper and golfing and he won't kick your ass by saying "cabron' with his "most interesting man in the world" voice....

WillRunForChocolate 06-19-2013 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jovigirloz (Post 1140677)
Just a bit ;)

A question for you all....
If Richie was to write a tell all, would you read it? Or would you feel like you were being disloyal?

I'd read it, but probably feel a little bit guilty.

Hell yes I'd read it, and wouldn't feel guilty in the least!


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