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Adrian |
Got 2 new verses:
Now that I'm here all alone I'm discovering their lies Like my broken heart will heal with time (beginning of second verse) Don't know who I'm fighting for What's real or my memories of you I don't even know if we can work But this I promise you (cue second chorus) What do you guys think? Adrian |
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One word A million emotions I can still remember the first time Last time you said it I denied Now I wish I hadn't lied I ran away from you But I came Back That night You thought you could speak for me You told me I loved you I laughed and said no How could I see the truth Naked on the bed you lie I've seen your heart From the inside Its a nice place to visit But to stay there And lose being free I knew it wasn't For me Thats what I thought Last time you said it I denied Now I wish I hadn't lied But even though I never knew I came back for you But nothing changed That I could see You were still you I was still me Still just two halfs Of a seperate whole A one sided dance Without a soul Or thats the way It seemed to me Just a discarded memory How could I know That deep inside My heart and love Just couldn't hide? After all I came back for you Bloody hell, thats long.... Right, thats my idea for the first half, what do you think? Feel free to dissect it, its very different from the way I'd normally write, so I'm not wholly confident in it, but there ya go... Comment, criticise, its all good :) Keep On Rockin' |
How DO you do it? This is great! You just outwrote Jim Steinman, you know that, don't you? One thing though:I don't like the line "Naked on the bed you lie". That just seems...I don't know...too...something. I'm sorry, I don't like it. I think its a little too adult, if you know what I mean. Could you change that one line? Thanks! I'm gonna take a crack at putting together the second part today.
Again, this is great work Walrus! Adrian |
Now that I'm here all alone
I'm discovering their lies Like my broken heart will heal with time I see you all the time But the barrier is still there A simple hello can make my day I don't know if we could would we say more Or if we wouldn't dare I can't know what you're feeling now Sadness regret A little of both Do you feel like me Or are you feeling hope We're both looking forward To the day when we can be together Its coming, but not real soon It'll take some time But they can't hold me back forever Someday this could all be through I've got all these memories Things we've done Things you said For all we are right now Whatever we were May as well be dead It all brings me around To that night I threw it all away I could've said yes Just one word Who knows where we'd be today I think I'm makin' myself sick Remembering how I lied I stumbled on my words They just couldn't come out So I just go on the way I am Can't even say I tried This is kinda starting to hurt I'm starting to doubt How I ever could've thought of you Don't know who I'm fighting for What's real or all these memories of you I don't even know if we can work But this I promise you Chorusx6 Last time you said it I denied Now its the truth and not a lie I'm coming back for you For all the people I've left behind I won't let go this time I'm coming back for you Walrus:You want to add anything to that? Do you think I should? I added a whole bunch of new stuff to what we had. Adrian |
just to let you know im still alive...
looking at the stuff thats been added since.. its looking good... had a tune to heartbreak town as soon as i read it... hoefully ill remember it. finding life really hard atm. have got reading weeks coming up and all my dedlines are before it meaning i have two weeks completely free which im gonna set aside to recording some of this stuff if noone has any objections. hope you're all okay. sorry for letting the side down. sara |
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I'm really glad u come back, hope fully u record the songs as soon as u get time. we are looking forward for it. But don't ingonr ur studies for it. Do it when u have free time. :P |
hey allmike.. its not a question of ignoring studies to do it... i get 4 and a half days off a week. my reading weeks just mean i dont have to go into my lectures as theyre meant to be used to write essays and stuff... xept my deadlines are all before so i get 2 weeks off instead.
but yeah. ill give it a go soonish. |
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Any one got any modification or next phase for Heartbreak Town?.
I will try to put with in couple of day, my second phase for it. |
Tawtami:WOW!!! Recordings of our songs? Soon? This is great! I know you'll do a good job.
Allmike:I'll get to work on some modifications of Heartbreak town soon. I've been kind of busy. Walrus:I thought up a replacement line for that one line I didn't care for. What would you think about: For a hundred broken hearts you've cried"? Like it? Adrian |
Hmmmm.... the only problem with that is that "heart" is used on the next line as well. How about: "For all the time that's passed you've cried"?
Keep On Rockin' |
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Adrian |
hey y'all! i know it's been a long while, i apologize for disappearing. i'd still like to make the cover art if u still need someone to do it.
i've read over some of the recent work that's been written and y'all have done an awesome job!! :D |
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Let say our band has grown considerably. :D |
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but that's cool, whenever u can iron out all the details i'll start on it! |
Allmike:I'm in favor of changing the band's name from Dry County to DC. Its less confusing to outsiders, and it wouldn't run us into any legal issues if we distribute the CD online (as it is, we can't sell the CD, due to the fact that we included a sequel to a BJ song). What do you think?
Adrian |
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The Walrus, Adrian (c)11/2003 Back One word A million emotions I can still remember the first time Last time you said it I denied Now I wish I hadn't lied I ran away from you But I came Back That night You thought you could speak for me You told me I loved you I laughed and said no How could I see the truth For all the time that's passed you've cried I've seen your heart From the inside Its a nice place to visit But to stay there And lose being free I knew it wasn't For me Thats what I thought Last time you said it I denied Now I wish I hadn't lied But even though I never knew I came back for you But nothing changed That I could see You were still you I was still me Still just two halfs Of a seperate whole A one sided dance Without a soul Or thats the way It seemed to me Just a discarded memory How could I know That deep inside My heart and love Just couldn't hide? After all I came back for you Chorusx6 Last time you said it I denied Now I wish I hadn't lied I came back for you Guitar solo Now that I'm here all alone I'm discovering their lies Like my broken heart will heal with time I see you all the time But the barrier is still there A simple hello can make my day I don't know if we could would we say more Or if we wouldn't dare I can't know what you're feeling now Sadness regret A little of both Do you feel like me Or are you feeling hope We're both looking forward To the day when we can be together Its coming, but not real soon It'll take some time But they can't hold me back forever Someday this could all be through I've got all these memories Things we've done Things you said For all we are right now Whatever we were May as well be dead It all brings me around To that night I threw it all away I could've said yes Just one word Who knows where we'd be today I think I'm makin' myself sick Remembering how I lied I stumbled on my words They just couldn't come out So I just go on the way I am Can't even say I tried This is kinda starting to hurt I'm starting to doubt How I ever could've thought of you Don't know who I'm fighting for What's real or all these memories of you I don't even know if we can work But this I promise you Chorusx6 Last time you said it I denied Now its the truth and not a lie I'm coming back for you For all the people I've left behind I won't let go this time I'm coming back for you So what do you guys think? Like it? Adrian |
i like it... ill have az look at a tune...
this week and next week and i get my two weeks of solid arranging/recording. expect things..... hopefully good. soon. heh am feeling a little better in case you couldnt tell. somewhere in the last few months of my life theres a song waiting to be written.... :) sara |
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I don't know why, but I just prefer DC instead of DCR. Dry County Rock refers to the music instead of the band I think. Also, DCR looks more like an abreviation for "doctor". :lol:
Adrian |
i oprefer DC
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Or else instead of plain DC we can make it like DeeCee or something like that. |
dc is famous anyhow.. it being short for 'Direct Current'
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DC is good enough for me
Keep On Rockin' |
So then it is official,
WELCOME TO BAND ' DC '. :D |
cool.
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Ok, I rearranged Heartbreak Town and added a few new lines. I kind of set it up like TAALS, with the 2 choruses. Here it is:
HEARTBREAK TOWN Verse 1 This is the town Where I learn to fly higher This is the town Where I built dreams of colour All this time My friends were friends Love was real and life was full Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Verse 2 Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running in all its vain Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town Guitar Solo Bridge Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running in all its vain Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town What do you think? Personally, I think its Dry County-like. A great song! Allmike, you've done great work writing this song! You'll probably be putting me out of a job here soon! 8) Adrian |
I like what did with the song Adrian. But i think it need another phase. I will try to write and post it, u can add it like u want it.
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i have a recording for heartbreak towen.... can some onr post the second verse so i can do it properly....
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This my next verse
How do you feel if your world suddenly turn into dark?, too dark How do you take if your friends finally torn your heart ?, to deep. Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running in all its vain Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town Time was right, life was stright Hard to imagine its all gone sight Time to bring some smile back Try to heal the some heart ache. Time for leave town, the heartbreak town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running in all its vain Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town. What u guys think do u wanna change anything??. |
ill englishize it for you.....
ill prolly play around with it a little anyhow just in terms of singability but thats a spontaneous thing |
Heartbreak Town
Allmike, Adrian (c)11/2003 Verse 1 This is the town Where I learn to fly higher This is the town Where I built dreams of colour All this time My friends were friends Love was real and life was full Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. How would you feel If your world suddenly went dark? How would you feel If your friends finally tore your heart? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running in all its vain Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town Guitar Solo Time was right, life was good Hard to imagine its all gone down Time to bring some smile back Try to heal the some heartache Time for leave town, the heartbreak town Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running in all its vain Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town Its finished! Probably the fastest song we've written so far. Good job Allmike! What do you guys think? Tawtami:Would you like me to PM you all our songs so far? That way you don't have to sort through the pages looking for the lyrics. Walrus:You still working on The Secret Project? Adrian |
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So what Walrus and sara think about it?. Can someone pm me and tell me what is that secret project if u don't mind ofcourse. |
that would be brilliant! it would save me so much time!
i got a friend with a hard disk recorder now :D means decent recording. i have a question for you guys, if you guys think any of these are any good, how would you feel about live performances?? ideally it would be amazing for us to all get together and do it, but that may take a while, LOL i was thinking more about my band... obviously relevant people would get credit for the songs as written and stuff.... i havent really given any great thought to it yet.. its just one of those really late night ideas that you have sometimes..... feel free to say no or whatever... just thought id throw that one out, and do i like the song ? i came up with the tune in 5 minutes...... :D YES :D i will need to play around with the 2nd verse a bit... see how i can make it fit to the tune... any probs with that? oh and i may well have a song soon... its kinda there... just need to make an attempt at actually getting it down lyrically... it might be a little dark/depressing though... so advance warning. heh, and i too am beginning to wonder about this 'secret project'.... lol sara |
okay this is the reworked version... nothing huge done except added a little to verse 2 where there was previously the end of the prechorus making it impossible to orchestrate... other than that only a couple of word alterations to make it fit. oh and (later thought) i think the bridge should be before the solo (have moved it on this as this is what im making the track from)
okayt so actually slightly more m ajopr changes than i anticipated.... having done it.. feel free to dismiss... or to keep... there are a few major changes.. will post again in a sec and highlight them. thoughts questions comments? Verse 1 This is the town Where I learn to fly higher This is the town Where I built dreams of colour All this time My friends were friends Love was real and life was full Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why do all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. What would you feel If your world went dark? How would you feel If you lost your heart? did you ever realise you could ever feel so alone Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running through its veins Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town Bridge: Time was right, and life was good Hard to imagine that its all gone now time to heal some heartache Time to leave this heartbreak town Guitar Solo (to verse) at least thats what i think it needs to be Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running in all its vain Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town [/i][/quote] |
additions in green, major changes in red, anything else in indigo
Verse 1 This is the town Where I learn to fly higher This is the town Where I built dreams of colour All this time My friends were friends Love was real and life was full Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why do all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. What would you feel If your world went dark? How would you feel If you lost your heart? did you ever realise you could ever feel so alone Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why do all these dreams come crashing down? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running through its veins Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town Bridge: Time was right, and life was good Hard to imagine that its all gone now time to heal some heartache Time to leave this heartbreak town Guitar Solo (to verse) at least thats what i think it needs to be Prechorus Why does everything that starts so good have to end? Why do all these dreams come crashing down again and again? Too many questions Too much pain Too little comfort Chorus 1 Blame it on life, blame it on love All I know is its coming down All I blame is this town ...Heartbreak Town. Chorus 2 Its a Heartbreak Town I'm still feeling the pain Its a heartbreak Town I'm still seeing the stains Its a no-love town Hate is running through its veins Every smile is buried in its soil I'm only a broken boy Left to bleed and toil In this Heartbreak Town |
I like it! I think we all agree that you should make any adjustments to it that you feel will make it fit together musically. Keep up the good work! I don't know how everyone else would feel about you bringing your band into it. We'd kind of hoped to bring in JT musicians, but I'm ok with it, as long as they have a place too. That said, would anyone mind me contacting Arash to ask him about joining? He's a great guitar player, and writes good lyrics too. Live performances - I'm not sure how well that would work...
Expect the other songs to be PM'd to you later today. Walrus:You want to tell them about The Secret Project, or would you rather release it first? Adrian |
gah...
knew i shoulda thought it out better before saying anything ive been completely misunderstood. forget i said anything |
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