Letting Some Feelings Out....
 

I thought I would just tell you the story of Heather and I and tell you my problem at the end. I had first seen Heather in the halls at my High School and told my best friend Josh that she was a beautiful girl. He was like "In your dreams." This was at the beginning of the school year by the way. So, I never talked to her, only saw her in the halls and she never noticed me. I met her best friend Aimee, in which I liked at the time and that was the first time I met Heather. The only things we said to each other was hello. Nothing special, or anything. I found out Aimee was a bitch and never dated her. So things went on the way it did until January. At the end of each semester we change classes and as I went to my 3rd Block Geometry class, I notice somebody I know. As I sit down she picks her head up and it ends up being Heather. We never talked, just smiled. Things went on like that for the first couple weeks then we started talking. She was really fixated on hooking me up with her friend Aimee, and she did. The problem was that I really liked Heather and she knew it, we just didn't let that get out. Well, as I was dating Aimee, she was off ignoring me and I figured it wouldn't last long. Well, Heather and I talked on the computer that night and I was honest and I told her that I liked her and her reaction was "I KNEW IT!" I asked her if she liked me and she said that she couldn't because her best friend was dating me. I was heartbroken. So it went on from there... Things felt weird, Aimee and I broke up. I decided not to give up, but there was a roadblock. Aimee told Heather specifically not to date me. I was so mad at her. So, I finally poured my heart out to Heather and I am sure it got her attention. I did it in a letter and she was surprised. It took a long time but never worked out. The last day of school was over and nothing happened. We still talked online and I supported her while she broke up with her gay ass boyfriend Michael. He was a loser. She ended up asking me to come by after she got off work one day. I did and when I saw her my eyes got big and she was the most beautiful thing to ever walk the face of the earth. Things just happened from there. We started seeing each other during the summer just as friends. Until one special night when we watched "The Ring" on the couch and I grabbed for her hand and we just got close like that. It was really sweet. The thing went on for a few nights until our first kiss. Outside her car, it must have lasted 5 minutes but I could have been there the rest of my life. That is how I knew that I was in love with the girl. I told her that one night on the phone and she couldn't believe it. I didn't want to scare her off but I just had to tell her my feelings. She accepted them and learned to love me too. We went to Paramounts Carrowinds one day and spent the whole day together, what 2 people in love would do. I liked the ride home because her friend drove and we were in the backseat steaming up the windows! :lol: Things were great until July 3rd. The day I left for Oklahoma. It was a sad day and I remember holding her in my arms in front of my parents car. She didn't want to let go. She got in her car balling her eyes out, and I was too. I told her to leave first and we just looked at each other as she pulled off, blew me a kiss, waved and went on. At that time, I thought I was going to break down. I wanted to die... So, I moved and missed her every second we were apart. July 18th was a wonderful day because we spent 2 and a half weeks together here in Oklahoma. She left on August 3rd, the last day I saw her. Until that day our hearts have grown apart. I quote, "Absense makes the heart grow fonder." I really don't agree with it and I miss her dearly. It just keeps getting worse and worse and now it is at the breaking point. She is out all the time and I am here, waiting for her, missing her. When I decide I want to go out she has a cow and doesn't want me to go. I don't think it is fair and I get fed up with it and we fight. It happens every week and I just think we don't want to lose each other. What should I do? Well, thank you for listening and if you have any advice that would be wonderful. Thanks everyone. :)

Ryan

Well, here's my rookie opinion...

Maybe you should try being apart for a bit (well, you are apart, but you know what I mean). Just take a break from each other, see what happens. You're young, she's young, give it a try. Still talk and hang out with each other what little you can, but just try not to be quite so serious...I know I'm not much older than you, but you're far too young to be so miserable from being apart and then not knowing what she's doing and her getting upset when you do something...

I can't... I will be even more miserable! :?

Ryan

Yes, but will you look back when you are older and regret not going out while you were young?
:?
Have you spoken to Heather about all of this? If so, what does she say?

I'm not saying cut all ties from her or anything...but casually see different people...Believe me, I know how hard it is to be apart from someone you love. It really is torture. But you've gotta make the best of it because right now, there's nothing you can do to change it.

I mean, she does the same thing about me. I think trust is a big part of our relationship and we just tend to get out of hand. I do go out with friends and have fun still... But she doesn't like like it. Regarding Mouse's question, yes, she knows about it. We talked about it last night and we both agreed to trust each other more. I just wanted some other opinions and advice.

Ryan

Well, Ryan I'm sorry that things aren't going so well for you and Heather right now. I know that I wouldn't be able to be that far away from Mike for that long. I would wait and see what happens when she comes out in a few weeks. That way you guys will be together and you can see how things are when she's with you. I wouldn't stay at home all the time because she doesn't want you to go out though. It's not fair to you for her to be able to go do whatever she wants, but you can't. If she doesn't trust you, then there is something deeper wrong. I've been with Mike for 14 years (Today!) and whenever anyone asks us how we've lasted, our answer is that we always trusted each other. I hope things work out for you!

Happy Anniversary!!!! :D :wink:
Ryan

Hey Ryan,

My girlfriend and I have been together for 7 and 1/2 years now, and we've had to be apart from one another several times, longest was for 6 months.
I think the most important thing is to be honest and trust one another. I mean if she has no problem telling you she's going out with friends that means she feels her love for you is strong enough, and the same if you're ok telling her you're having fun it probably means your love for her is strong enough. As long as you have no doubt about your love for one another and from one another it's ok. As long as true love is there, just stay honnest, trustfull and trustworthy as both of you seem to be now.

"Absence is to love what wind is to fire, it extinguishes the little and pokes the great."
(Translated from french with words I'm not quite sure about but I hope you get the message :lol: )

I hope you two make it through this tough period.

Ponrauil

Thanks! That makes me feel much better! :D

Ryan