Finding someone
 

Please excuse if this post is a little, erm, disorganized. I don't do this type of thing often, or, uh, well. :?

I met someone (a female someone) at Driver's ED about 2 1/2 months ago. Very nice, tried several times to include me (I have this unfortunate tendency to fade to the back of groups and try to soak up as much information as possible, it has something to do with my not liking to stand out) in stuff, funny, etc. I intended to get her email address the last day of class, but circumstances went against me and I wasn't able to.

Summer comes, and I have a bit of free time in between work and college classes. I know where she works (or rather, where she worked as of 2 1/2 months ago) and I'm thinking of trying to find her. Fortunately, my best friend also worked at her place of employment and can help me with that.

My problem is this:Is this a good idea? I do NOT intend to try to get into any type of relationship other than friends (just not the way I operate), but I'm still a little...nervous. Supposing this all works out, what do I say? "Hi, we were in the same driver's ed class nearly 3 months ago, and I thought you were nice, so I came looking for you at work? Wanna hang out sometime?" Is she gonna think I'm a stalker? Am I going to be giving her reason to think I am a stalker? Should I just forget the whole thing? Or am I over-analyzing the situation as it is my usual tendency to do?

Thanks,

Adrian

Cute :D

If I was her, I wouldn't think you were a stalker, but I wouldn't think your intentions would be 'just being friends' either. I'd be very flattered, though and at least curious to find out what you're trying to achieve.

I'd say: go for it!

Re: Finding someone
 

YES!

huh? I assume she is around your age, what if she is looking for more than just a platonic friendship? Or do you mean you want to be friends FIRST, which of course is the best way to go about these things :) Being nervous is normal and even if it shows, it's mighty cute ;)

YES, exactly. Be straightforward and honest - girls like that :) I'd be very impressed if a guy came up with an honest story like that vs. some silly line.

NO. Why would she think you are a stalker? A stalker is someone who won't let go even after he/she's been told that their attention is unwanted. She hasn't had that chance yet, so, no you are not coming off as a stalker and she most likely will be totally flattered and impressed.


No.

yes, but that is ok. Better to over-analyze than to be annoying and careless :)


Good luck with it!

What she said.


Good luck.

Go for it Aidy!!!! :)

Adrian - it's called dating and it's a GOOD thing :D . Even if it never goes anywhere she will be flattered (probably) that you sought her out. And at your age "just friends" is a good thing to be and there is always the future possibility of being more than just friends.
What you want to do sounds like a good start to me.

Kathleen

she's in your drivers ed class (which i assume is some daft american thing)

she makes a point of including you in stuff

you like to back out (which is the 8th deadliest sin in my bible, but i digress)

you kno wwhere she works

you want to make contact

but you dont ''like'' like her.







what i say to this is bullshit :D

but i digress

if you like her then admit it man, as you said, you dont do this shit often so its taken someone special to do it.

what i'll say and i'm not a mad player (though i try) if you dont ask you dont get and if you dont get, you dont get)



look at it this way. im bungee jumping tomorrow (literally) 1, 2, 3... jump wether im ready or not, im over the edge wether i want to be or not. id rather be going 1, 2, 3 hi remember me than 1,2,3 shit this is kinda high. seriously this is how i approach girls when im kinda nervbous, 1 2 3 hi, you've started talking, jack shit you can do about it now.

it's mentality mate and you literally can train yourself to have a better one with regards to women.

Its better to regret the things you have done , than what you havent done :D

Re: Finding someone
 

If anything "extra-friendship" were ever to happen, friendship is a stage it would have to go through first.

Well, if someone who'd only seen me for about 22 hours total, two and a half/three months ago came looking for me at my place of employment and asked if I wanted to hang out...I'd be a little weirded out. I mean...what do I say? Suppose all this comes about, then what? Try and find a time when she's on break and order something to drink, talk about what's happened in the last quarter year?

Adrian

Re: Finding someone
 

which is how it is supposed to be :)

why would that weird you out? Wouldn't you be rather flattered? Someone actually took the time and looked you up based on the fact that you seemed nice? I don't think it is weird at all - don't sweat it.


Yes :) It's that easy :)

Don't order when she is on a break cause then she won't be serving you ;)

If she seems friendly and open, ask her if she wanted to go to the movies sometimes or whatever people your age do :) Ask what day would be best, get her number and make sure you call her.

I know it's awkward and you know what? It always is. I still get flustered and think and re-think every sentence a hundred times, but if you don't do it, you'll be sitting at home alone every single night for the rest of your life. Don't worry too much. You are good with words, you are cute and she obviously likes you as she tried to include you in stuff, there's nothing to lose. Even IF she doesn't want to 'do' stuff with you, believe me, she'll still be totally flattered. Not the worst thing to happen.

Go for it!!