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jbjhand 11-13-2005 04:29 PM

Life and Death
 
2 weeks ago 2day i was at the hospital with my best friend when his wife gave birth to their first child Jessica. it was a great day and she is a beautiful girl.

i am 26 my best friend Jon is 24 and it was very hard to believe that he was now a father, even though you know it is coming its still very strange.

On tuesday my nan fell over in the kitchen and while my mum looked after my grandad i went in the ambulance with my nan to the hospital.
after they had given her some morphine for the pain they did an xray which showed she had broken her hip, which made her worry because she wanted to get home to look after my grandad.

anyway after they had took her to a ward i went back to her flat to get her some books and clothes, and they were going to do the operation to fix her hip the next day. my mum took grandad to a home for the night as he cant do much for himself.

wednesday i went to work thinking cant wait to go to see nan tonight.
i aint sure what time they operated but it was in the afternoon.
the hospital rang wednesday night to say that they couldnt wake nan up properly after the op and that she was being moved to intensive care.

the doctor explained to us ( her 2 daughters , 2 sons, me and my brother) that she might not make it.

we went in to see her,i held her hand i told her she could beat it that we still needed her that i loved her.

she died at 6.25am on thursday 83 years old.

we took my grandad to feed the ducks this morning and he laughed and smiled. we took him back to the home and he cried. we are going back to see him in a minute we will take a game with us that we normally play with him on a sunday. he is confused they were married for 63 years.

when i left my nan tuesday night we had a chat and i said i wished things could stay like they were when we were young and she said she did too because "we had a lot of fun" she told me she loved me lots and i told her i loved her too. im so gratful for that.

the funeral is on friday at 1.30pm i dont think ill ever believe she is gone i thought she was invinsible i never ever thought she would die (i know thats stupid)

my nan spent her entire life giving to other people. even as i write this i cant believe she is gone. my whole family is devestated. we are all so so lucky to have had my nan she is the most amazing person i have ever known. i will always miss her.

i aint sure why im writing this on here to be honest.
just make sure that the people you love know that you do.

Captain Walrus 11-13-2005 04:38 PM

I'm happy for the one, and sorry for the other. My grandad died in February, and its tough. Are you going to the funeral? I found it kind of nice, to be surrounded by so many friends and family, and it was very helpful.

Don't be a stranger to your friend and his new baby. As well as having someone to talk to, you can help to bring a new life up into the world, to try to make the passing of another easier

Keeper 11-13-2005 05:10 PM

I'm sorry for your loss. But try and be happy that your grandmother lived to such an age, and that she was happy in the end. It might sound harsh, but it all being so sudden saved you the trauma of going through a long, painful illness, for instance.

I hope your friend's little girl is doing fine. Newborn babies are great. Stay around her and you'll cheer up immediately :)

jbjhand 11-13-2005 10:50 PM

thanks guys. i am going to the funeral not looking forward to it but no one ever does.
im sorry i posted this really cause i didnt wanna depress anyone but i think writing it made me feel a bit better.
im 26 and ive never had to deal with death before so i know i am very lucky. and i am glad that my nan didnt have to suffer.
cheers

Kathleen 11-13-2005 11:00 PM

I'm sorry for your loss. Sometimes things work out that way though. My family lost a 92 year old grandmother only a month after my daughter was born - a third and late in life child. It was very nice that she got to see her great granddaughter - the only girl in the family just before she died.

Sometimes talking about it helps - even to strangers. Sometimes you can say things to people you don't know that you wouldn't say to someone who knew you well.

Kathleen

Irishshin 11-14-2005 12:57 AM

:( Im sorry for your loss.
Going to the funeral will be hard but in a way it helps, I found.
I know writing helped me so much when I lost my grandmother.

Krycek 11-14-2005 01:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jbjhand
i aint sure why im writing this on here to be honest.
just make sure that the people you love know that you do.

I'm really sorry for your loss Lee, I kinda understand though, my grans brother died last Friday and I know she'll be gone very soon which is so strage because as you said, you think your gran will always be here. It's great that you were there with her before she passed away.
86 is a fantastic age though, and if there's anything good that can be said is at least she didn't have to suffer for years before she passed. I think everybody would like to eventually go in such peace.

It's good that you wrote this though, I'm sure it helps you to come to terms with your loss and don't worry, time really will heal the pain. Take care!



Phil

jbjhand 11-14-2005 12:05 PM

cheers Phil still aint gone to work yet and its about 10 now i think. very weird feelings right now.
but listened to some jovi yesterday that helped a bit and i see they played captain crash so thats great, hope i get to hear it in dublin or england somewhere.

thanks phil

jess 11-14-2005 12:14 PM

I'm sorry to hear that.
There is nothing to say.
Must be so hard for your grandad. For the rest of the family too of course but i think of him first. As you said they were married for 63 years !!! that's beautiful.
Stay strong for him.

One of my friend is in coma and we're just waiting for the bad news. Silly but what's cheering me up is that he'd find his son again i hope, he died ten years ago in a car accident. But there are still 4 sons who need him ....

Life is unfair, again.

jbjhand 11-14-2005 06:09 PM

it is beautiful my nan always used to say to me "dont worry lee ill look after him for you" . and now we will look after him for her.

im so sorry about your friend that is tragic. god life can be so hard sometimes.
i hope some light comes into their lives.


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