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Neurotica80 12-22-2006 03:40 PM

White Wine
 
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor about White Wine

White Wine is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. White Wine can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything

You will notice the benefits of White Wine almost immediately, and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent You from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past, and you will discover many talents you never knew you had.

Stop hiding and start living, with White Wine

White Wine may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use White Wine. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it. Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister


The consumption of white wine may make you think you are whispering when you are not

The consumption of white wine is a major factor in dancing like a retard

The consumption of white wine may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them

The consumption of white wine may cause you to think you can sing

The consumption of white wine may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning


The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.


WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.


The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are Laughing WITH you


The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy


The consumption of alcohol may be a major factor in getting your ass kicked

Captain Walrus 12-22-2006 03:55 PM

Yuck

Red wine = much better

Thats all :)

Kathleen 12-22-2006 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Walrus (Post 713750)
Yuck

Red wine = much better

Thats all :)

Oh yeah - what he said.

The only white wine worth consuming is really good champagne - otherwise "make mine red" (and lots of it) :D

Kathleen

gazthomas 12-22-2006 05:57 PM

lmao at the ex lovers at 4 in the mornin


done that b4


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