help!
 

hey guys can u help me again? (bloody school again!) i know ive done this before and its probably annoying you all now but... (please! help me, pretty please!)
im in the school orchestra and we're doin a concert in a couple of weeks and i really dont feel like it cos theres a girl there whos kind of a friend but she also kind of bullies me, (except im not supposed to admit it). the last time there was one of these shows, i was really ill, and we were practising for it, and she was picking on me and telling everyone in the orchestra my secrets that she'd promised to keep. that really gutted me. and then she started doing this thing that shes been doing for the last 2 or 3 years which is whenever she sees me and her little brother anywhere near each other she pulls him away from me and says im dangerous and wild and mad and i could start killing him at any moment, and then she tells everyone around how "dangerous" i apparantly am. (a few days ago i was talking with him and some others in his year, which is 2 years below me and this girl's year, and she saw us and started calling me a paedophile.)
recently someone else who had been bullying me for a long time was picking on me in a lesson and the teacher wasnt doing anything and left and she got even nastier after the teacher left and we had an arguement and i slapped her and i got in trouble for it even though i didnt hurt her (and she admitted it didnt hurt, except when she was telling on me, thats when she exaggerated and said that i had hurt her, to get me in more trouble. and also theres been times shes hurt me even worse, and not got in troble) and this first girl has been saying even worse stuff about me cos of that, and shes been saying im violent and im going to jail and im 1st on death row, and this is really hypocritical of her cos 2 years ago someone else slapped me even harder, it hurt for more than an hour afterwards and there was a massive mark on my face, (we were on a school trip and i tripped up and swore, and when i got up this girl slapped me for ruining the image of the school. we were hours away from school, and not in school uniform!) and at the time she said it was a good thing that shed slapped me.
the problem is ive told this first girl loads of times that im sick of her taking the p!$$ out of me but she doesnt listen and says "when have i done that?" etc and says its not being nasty or bitchy or bullying, its only teasing, and she does it to all her other friends too. ive seen her teasing them and she really is teasing them, its different to when its to me, cos she never calls them what she calls me or says they deserve to be slapped, and she doesnt go round telling everyone stuff about them, but she does that to me, she goes round saying all kinds of weird $h!t about me. once she was calling me a nazi and went round saying i was a nazi to about 20 people before i stopped her and said to stop, and she said "its only teasing, i do it to all my friends, just watch" and went to them and said "you smell" etc, but she didnt go round telling 20-odd people that!
what should i do about it? im in the same class as her for loads of subjects and im in the orchestra with her, and shes even worse during orchestra cos she shows off with that crowd, and also shes loads better than me at music (shes got loads of qualificiations in it but she has no passion for it. ive lent her lots of records, including BJ, and shes said they werent "proper" music, and she doesnt understand when i talk about how much they mean to me.) and shows off and picks on me for not being so good at it, and also if theres italian terms in it that i dont understand she says im thick, cos everyone expects me to speak loads of italian cos im part-italian, but i can only say about a dozen words, so when she knows something i dont then she gets all smug about it, and also quite racist. (if they used african terms instead of italian terms and someone got racist at a part-african person for not knowing something, that would be racist and not allowed, but she really gets away with it when its racist at me!)
i want to skive off the next show (i skived off the last cos i was sick anyway, and she picked on me and made other people gang up on me, which made me feel even worse) but if i dont do the next one ill get in trouble cos the music teacher wants me to do it and if i dont do it again shell think im skiving. even if im really ill shell think im faking it and skiving, cos twice in a row is a bit of a coincidence... i dont really want to talk about it with my parents and im not too keen on talking about it with my teachers, cos theyll say "why did u let it go on so long, its your fault, why didnt u sort it out/tell us earlier, etc." i dont want to get her in too much trouble cos shes one of my only friends (maybe that should be "friends") and i dont think she realizes how much shes annoying me, but when i try to tell her she doesnt listen or understand, and she says im complaining about nothing, and its only teasing. (and then she wonders why i dont trust her any more.)

People only bully because they are insecure, and most likely scared of you.

It sounds like she does this because she knows she won't get much of a reaction from you, so I suggest 2 scenarios;

1): Tell your parents and teachers and get them all together for a meeting or something (this may result in more bullying though)

2): Beat the crap out of her.

Get some new friends. You don't need 'friends' like this

Keep On Rockin'

I had this problem, too, some (2-4) years ago. I know it's not that easy but you gotta ignore her. She'll try not to show it but she'll be damn angry. For me it was a help to find people who had the same problem with this girl. YOu get better ideas and moral help together. Talking to teachers can put her down a little and can cause that she failes a lot of tests.
My last problems with her were solved when people grew up and didn't celebrate her for what she was doing anymore. Well, now she isn't at school anymore and the atmosphere there is much better now. :wink: I hope you can find a solution. But I'm sure you will. This girl acts like a child and anytime she gotta realize that she isn't one anymore.

Stop worying about being popular, and having everybody as your friend. If somebody's picking on you, tell them to f(*k off, because trying to understand them, or trying to be their friend won't help..... That's assuming that simply ignoring them isn't working, which is really what you should do..... Be your own person, if you don't want to do this, doin't do it, if you do want to do the concert then do it. DOn't make up phoney excuses that it's somebody elses fault, if you dont' do it, accpet that your doing it for reasons other than somebody told you not too (please :roll: )

I've made several assumption about you that maybe I shouldn't have, but at the end of the day, if she's your friend, then just accept it, and don't come on here complaining about it, trying to get sympathy. If she's not your friend, ignore her, or just hit her, hard enough to let her know your serious. If you come across as a soft touch, then people will take advantage....

From what you've said, she sounds awful. If you're one of these people who has to be evrybody's friend, because it's too aquard being in a class where somebody doesn't like you, then youre 16, and will be leaving school in a matter of months, so it isn't that big of a problem.

thanks for your advice. i would beat the crap out of her but i did that once to someone else (well i didnt really, i just said i would, and looked like i would, and pretended i was gonna, but never did) but i got a reputation and thats partly the reason why i get called "violent" now. (but that person did deserve a punch, shame she never got it.)

Who cares? This is rock and roll, you're meant to be rebelious, and not care abut what people think!

wrong - they do it for many other reasons... and usually not the one you listed

what is a reputation ? something built on real facts or not ? right, so, you have this reputation, use it to help you, if you see what i mean,
people think you are violent, and this girl need something to show her how to behave !!! You're young, don't think about what people could say !
You are living with too much stress only because of this little kfckhkg :evil:

Again, this only comes back to my point, people are way to preocupied with what people think of them, and thus want to be everybody's friends.

If people really believed that you were violent, and dangerous, they wouldn't call you.

Also, just out of interest, could you take her? :D